Don’t Be Scared Of The Bears!

Closeup Photography of Brown Teddy Bear

Teddy Bears have been around for over 100 years, but that doesn’t stop designers and inventors from coming up with wacky new methods of using, changing, or (in some cases) destroying them!
In the innovative to the kitsch, the world of Teddy Bears is full of inventive new ideas, which range from the wonderfully touching, to the downright weird!

The Teddy Bear Gun

Surprisingly, this isn’t a joke! This Japanese ‘toy’ has actually been designed to make life easier at your wedding! Instead of throwing confetti at the wedding couple, the Japanese go one step further and throw Teddy Bears!

Naturally, someone somewhere in Japan realised that this tradition could be made a great deal simpler if they had a gun to ‘throw’ the Teddy Bears for them, and so created the Teddy Bear Gun.
This contraption– produced by Japanese paintball gun manufacturers, Sunamiya– utilises the science supporting their paintball guns to thrust the Teddy Bear via a transparent barrel, high into the air with a simple ‘click’ of the trigger.

Fortunately, no Teddy Bears are injured with the use of such a contraption as each bear is fitted with their own mini parachute, so that they glide safely and gracefully back down to Earth to wish the bride and groom well on their journey.

USB Teddy Bear

At a first glance this is just a normal, cute Teddy Bear, but as soon as you pull its head off (Yes, you are expected to decapitate this poor Teddy Bear!) , it becomes a USB memory stick, with the mind acting as the cap.
Once plugged in, it appears like the Teddy Bear has been sucked into your PC! Poor thing. Perhaps someone had a score to settle? We’re not too sure when, or even if these Teddy Bears will come on to the market. So if you don’t feel like waiting to learn, it can not be that hard to pull apart one of your much loved cuddly toys…

The ‘Huggable’ Teddy Bear definitely fits into our ‘wonderful’ category!

This Teddy Bear is being developed to serve as a robotic companion for the sick, elderly or infirm who are unable to enjoy the presence of real animals, and the benefits this can bring. The idea of this ‘Huggable’ was born following clinical trials demonstrated that animals can reduce stress levels in patients, but a few- because of allergies or local restrictions- are not able, or allowed to have access to such animals.

Making use of the most recent sensate-skin technology, cameras from the eyes, microphones in the ears, wireless technologies and data collection methods, the Teddy Bear has been intelligently designed to react to touch in the way a real creature would, and communicate in a suitable manner.

The objective is to provide a very helpful tool for care providers that’s emotionally pleasing and provides real, measurable health benefits to patients. This must be the most advanced, forward thinking, technologically packed Teddy Bear we’ve ever seen!

Appealing to Teddy Bear fans all over the world, a nifty little Teddy Bear MP3 player, capable of storing 128mb of sound, using a USB connection, and a liberal $78 price tag, seems set to become one of the most useful and functional Teddy Bears accessible, without compromising on cuteness.
Made by Tomy, and weighing in at just 50g (excluding battery), this fairly retro looking product will provide you around 8 hours of playback from one AA battery!

As soft and as comforting as a ‘real’ Teddy Bear, this eccentric Teddy Bear Chair was designed by furniture designer Matti Klenell. Fantastic for any Teddy Bear lover looking for something completely different to furnish their house with, ‘Mido’ is an upholstered Easy Chair, shaped like a Teddy Bear, originally displayed at the Agate Gallery, Stockholm as part of an impressive solo exhibition.

No, this is not the latest military project, but a Teddy Bear fitted with the latest and most innovative technology. The Teddy Bear is being designed to respond to the Teddy Bear’s owners’ voice, movements and even facial expressions!

With Microsoft showcasing a high-tech Spy Robot Teddy Bear in the TechFest trade fair, the stage looks set for additional investment and development into intelligent Teddy Bears capable of recording minutes of your child’s day, reading them a book, and even linking to a parent’s system in a remote location to allow them to ‘program a repertoire for a child’. The possibilities seem endless!

Initially, this Teddy Bear was designed to plainly track somebody’s movement around a space, but since then, the whole project has exploded, and future strategies for the Teddy Bear will take this toy to an remarkable level of sophistication.

The Creepy Teddy Bear

This may be the strangest and most disturbing Teddy Bear I’ve ever come across, and slots into our ‘weird’ category perfectly!

Called the somewhat reassuring ‘TeddyBearBand’, this ‘cuddly toy’ was surprisingly designed by Philippe Starck who asserts that ‘an overabundance of toys fosters infidelity’ in children, leading him to create this sort of hybrid of Teddy Bears/soft toys which seemingly meets all of a child’s needs!

With this Teddy Bear using a rabbit for a hand, and a dog to get a foot, it certainly packs more animals into a cuddly toy than the average Teddy Bear, but I’m concerned about the dreams I will be having tonight after seeing this thing, let combined the effect it will have on a young child.

The Teddy Bear Remote Control

This slightly odd-looking Teddy Bear, designed by the designer Leah Culver, doubles up as an all-purpose remote control.

While maintaining it’s softness and child-like appeal, this Teddy Bear makes a remarkably effective, fully functional remote control. Squeeze the Teddy Bear’s torso to play/pause your own program or film, and adjust the volume with a soft pinch of the ear.

We really enjoy this one!

This cheeky but fun GPS-fitted Teddy Bear (Navirobo) sits on your dash and directs you to your destination. But heaven forbid if you take a wrong turn, for your cuddly companion– who even does a little jig when you finally reach your destination– will mock you!

This is a great, laugh-out-loud Teddy Bear, designed and manufactured in (you guessed it!) Japan, is going to be a great addition to your dashboard which will make your long journeys home far less tedious!

When Barney the guard dog went on a rampage in Wookey Hole Caves, it was no ordinary Teddy Bear that became one of her victims

Mabel, made in Germany in 1909, who formerly belonged to none other than the King himself– Elvis Presley– lay mortally wounded, surrounded by the remains of nearly a hundred rare Teddy Bears, destroyed by the foul-tempered Doberman Pinscher.

The Teddy Bears were on loan at the time of the attack, displayed at Wookey Hole Caves, Somerset. Mabel– bought for $40,000 by Sir Benjamin Slade, an avid collector of Elvis memorabilia– was, not-surprisingly, the star attraction.
Barney, who was supposed to be guarding the Teddy Bear collection, worth over #400,000 was wrestled to the ground among the remains of the Teddy Bears, with “Heads pulled off, arms, arms here and there, it was a total carnage really. I have never seen such a mess, there was stuffing, fluff and keep bits everywhere.”

Sir Benjamin was, understandably, not best pleased!

Can our Teddy Bears have feelings too?

With so many weird and great things happening in the Teddy Bear world, it makes you wonder whether our cuddly friends have feelings and emotions of their own. What would they think of the crazy ideas we have for Teddy Bears? Do they come awake at night and recall our moments of cruelty?

Perhaps it is sometimes true that we form connections with all the inanimate objects we surround ourselves with and finally humanise our Teddy Bears, and by doing this, we start treating them like they have human emotions- pain, fear, love. Whatever the case, here at Funky Bears, we’re sure the mad Teddy Bear creations will continue, and we can’t wait to see the next weird or terrific thoughts that people in the same industry as ourselves will produce!

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